Reset Button for Life

There's something entirely liberating about the "delete all posts" button in blogger. One press and everything you've ever said on this internet venue can never be accessed. I keep a backup of my posts for posterity (and possibly to show my children when I've almost died and don't have to fear the sheer embarrassment that would cause). But I can just make the blog lose its history...go somewhere else...wherever I feel to chose.

I'm at a turning point in my life. "The Reset Button" has been pressed, if you will. No longer am I the dawdling young college student, able to fritter away his time and expect the worst of life to be a late essay. Everything has real consequences. Words have to be watched, actions precisely determined. A lack of initiation can ruin a relationship, crush a dream, anything.

But the rewards are far greater as well. I have a chance to change the world in an substantial albeit minuscule way. I will soon be married, because I had the determination to maintain a relationship that is worth any cost. Children are wiser in the ways of science and logic, if only by a small fraction, because I worked in their lives. Any number of people have not been infected with viruses and bacteria because I sanitize everything and well. And someday, so far away, I will teach East Asia pastors how their 3rd century brothers understood the faith, how to translate the Greek texts themselves, or what the doctrine of predestination really means.

The last phrase has a taste of irony to me. I've officially decided which seminary I will be attending and it proudly declares a "Wesleyan-Arminian tradition" as its foundation. What's a Calvinist to do? Yes, I am now an official member of Asbury Theological Seminary in Wilmore, Kentucky (near Lexington, a couple hours south of Cincinnati). Why have I made this choice? Because they established a multicultural community in a town where the "historical downtown" is shorter than 500 yards. Because their president was taught under my favorite missionary and personal hero, Andrew Walls, and because they are hosting a seminar in Edinburgh that the 90-year-old Walls will be attending just because he respects them that much. Because the on-campus housing is absolutely gorgeous and Calvin's seminary housing is nigh identical to its college housing. Because Asbury will give me $6,000 to learn under them and Calvin will only give $3500. But the greatest reason? It feels like a place I can grow spiritually.

Will it be a perfect fit? I don't know. I worry about the academic rigor that they will provide at the early levels. The New Testament Intro course that I visited felt like an informal Bible Study. The Masters of Arts in Theological Studies they offer doesn't require Greek or Hebrew, which concerns me as well. Their theology is staunchly Arminian, which is a blessing and a curse: I will be challenged, but I will also grow through it. It is 6 hours from Jessica's family in Painesville and 8 hours from my family in Muskegon. Wilmore is hours from the nearest Asian grocery and as entertaining as any place with a population of 5,000.

In any case, it's just good to be decided. My life is heading in a direction again. I've felt so stagnant and disconnected. Now I have peace and purpose. It'll be refreshing to be a student again. I have not done well as anything else.